I'm flying to LA on Monday for the company's annual off-site. I've been dreading and kvetching about this for at least a month now so it will be good to get it over with. I know that I'll have a good time once we get there but the timing sucks because it is in the middle of a really busy time at work.
One of the reasons I'm hating this trip is that the fancy dinner on Tuesday is creative black tie.
We're going to be having a Casino Night and the theme is "Montecarlo." I've been hearing people talking about how they were dressing to the nines ("dripping in fake jewels", "fingerwaving my hair flapper style", "dug out a floor-length gown") and beyond for about two weeks now. I know that the last time they had this event, there were door prizes for the best dressed, most creative, etc.
Now, I haven't gotten dressed up for anything other than work since my wedding so I don't just happen to have the perfect dress in my wardrobe. Throw in that I have arthritis-induced psoriasis and acne, can't really walk around in heels and am at the heaviest that I've been post-pregnancy and you can see why I'm not thrilled with an event that will lead to me being judged by my appearance.
My boss has been stressing all week how important (and fun, it will be!) to dress the part. And then the reminder email that came out yesterday spelled out that cocktail dresses or dressy evening separates were required for the ladies.
Tomorrow I need to go through the painful process of trying to find SOMETHING, ANYTHING. I'm at the high-end of the misses spectrum but the very low end of the Plus sizes. Which puts me in an awesome limbo. There's usually nothing left at the higher Misses and the low Plus does not fit me well at all. The whole ordeal is causing me enough stress to not even want to go to the dinner but I know that won't go over well.
I'm feeling really insecure and body conscious. I know I need to get over this and find my confidence, my flow.