Yesterday can be summed up like this:
Mark would say "And how is this different from any other day?" and he'd probably be right. It just feels a bit more amplified than usual. I want to blame hormones, but I'm only taking progesterone right now and I don't think that affects mood. But I could be wrong.
I'm usually pretty even tempered but I've had more than one blow up recently. I've been getting more emotional, short-tempered and prone to say what's on my mind. My inner voice has become my outer voice a lot and that's almost led me to problems. Let's just say that my inner voice is one sarcastic, cutting bitch at times. I've come REAL close to saying something I shouldn't. Repeatedly.
Yesterday I got into a circular argument with one of my staff. I didn't understand what his problem was, but he was visibly upset and agitated and I was trying to get to the bottom of what was bothering him so I could fix it. I'm a fixer by nature. Come to mommy; she'll kiss it and make it feel better, type of thing.
Well... Mommy didn't fix this one. At ALL. We both wound up getting agitated about the whole thing and we wasted valuable time. At the end of the meeting I went into my boss' office to vent about what happened. I'd already made up my mind to approach my minion again in the morning and try to see what the motherfuck he was talking about, which was pretty much what he advised me to do.
I'm usually much better at dealing with irritations but right now every single niggling thing is getting to me. And I'm having absolutely NO problem expressing my displeasure about it.
Let's just hope that this anxiety or a phase brought about by a weird planetary conjunction. I'd hate to be bitchy and bitter all the time... Especially if I am (knock on wood) pregnant.
Keep going little Sea Monkeys...
